


morning coffee

by dwreed



Series: i know places [1]
Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Anxiety, Depression, M/M, Slice of Life
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-02
Updated: 2017-10-06
Packaged: 2019-01-08 00:15:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,831
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12243381
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dwreed/pseuds/dwreed
Summary: "At home, he quickly changed and went for his daily run, helping the woman who always had trouble getting her cart of flowers onto the curb, picking up the dropped menu from a cute man with glasses at the cafe a few blocks down (and staring for a little too long at him), waving at the little girl who owned the cat who’d gotten stuck in a tree, and then continuing on, farther and farther until he was so far that he didn’t even want to run back.He took the subway back, almost falling asleep and missing his stop, and then went up to bed and went to sleep.Waking up felt even more difficult the next morning."A story about mental illness and missed opportunities.





	1. about shiro

**Author's Note:**

> i've decided to break out of my shell and try something other than klance... it's not as difficult as i thought it would be.

When Takashi Shirogane woke up in the morning he swung his matching-socked feet out from the covers and meticulously made his bed. He went to the bathroom and showered, and brushed his teeth while staring in the mirror in disinterest, and got dressed. 

 

He made his coffee the same way as usual in his to-go cup - black with a bit of cream - and then was out the door, going to the underground and swiping his card so that he could board the subway to his job. 

 

The recruit office was bustling with the end of the semester, filled with fresh-out-of-high school seventeen and eighteen year olds unsure of what to do with their lives. He wasn’t sure if he was helpful, sprouting his prosthetic and scars as they sat down in the chair across from him at his desk. Still, somehow he was able to convince them it was a good opportunity if they decided to take it, shook their hands, and at 5 o’clock he was closing up the office and making his way home. 

 

Once there he changed into his running clothes and went for his daily run around the block, helping the woman who always had trouble getting her cart of flowers onto the curb, running past the cafe a few blocks down, and saving a cat from a tree.

 

Dinner was uneventful - his best friend, Keith, seemed too distracted by his studies to talk about much else, and too distracted by his phone going off to say much of anything either. 

 

“If you’re busy we could have rain checked.” Shiro offered as Keith stared in agitation at his phone, which was ringing; the caller ID screen was of him and his boyfriend (Lance, Shiro thought but wasn’t entirely sure). 

 

“No, it’s okay. I needed to get away from everything for a bit.” Keith turned his phone over and silenced it, but he still seemed preoccupied. 

 

It ended without fanfare. Shiro went home, did a load of laundry and then went to sleep. 

 

When Shiro woke up he swung his feet out of bed, decided not to make it, and went straight to the bathroom to shower and brush his teeth. For a while, he just stared at his reflection in tired apathy, wondering if he could call in and take a mental health day. After about ten minutes, he got dressed, went to make his coffee with a bit of cream, and then he was on his way. 

 

The subway was busy - he could see Keith and his boyfriend arguing about something on the other end of the car, but it was very obviously a bad time to go over and say hello. 

 

The recruitment office was especially busy as well, more frightened faces filling up the waiting room seats, and more kids effectively scared off by Shiro’s prosthetic. He forced himself to smile at them, trying to bring his energy up to encourage them, but it was difficult. 

 

Everything that day felt difficult.

 

5 o’clock couldn’t come soon enough, and he rushed out the door to make his way home. Keith and his boyfriend were on that train too, but it looked as though they’d made up (in fact, it was a little gross and obvious that they had). 

 

At home, he quickly changed and went for his daily run, helping the woman who always had trouble getting her cart of flowers onto the curb, picking up the dropped menu from a cute man with glasses at the cafe a few blocks down (and staring for a little too long at him), waving at the little girl who owned the cat who’d gotten stuck in a tree, and then continuing on, farther and farther until he was so far that he didn’t even want to run back.

 

He took the subway back, almost falling asleep and missing his stop, and then went up to bed and went to sleep.

 

Waking up felt even more difficult the next morning. 

 

Shiro got out of bed, standing in the shower for too long and staring at the tiled walls. He brushed his teeth and stared at himself in the mirror, also for too long. After contemplating calling in sick he walked out the door and hopped onto the subway. It was as crowded as usual. 

 

The recruitment office had a lot of concerned parents that day, some looking worried and others looking annoyed - like they wanted their kid to have their life figure out already. 

 

5 o’clock came slow as molasses. 

 

The subway ride home felt too fast. 

 

He felt overly aware on his run. It took a lot for him to help the woman struggling with her flower cart, he glanced back at the cute guy with glasses he’d seen the day previous at the cafe as he passed, paid no mind to the tree he’d saved a cat from, and then he was circling back home.

 

He climbed in bed and fell asleep. 

 

Shiro didn’t get out of bed right away the next morning. He pressed snooze, then pressed it again, and again, until finally he was 5 minutes away from when he usually left for work. He swung his matching-socked feet out of bed and got in the shower, taking too long as he let the warm water wash over him and stared at the tile.

 

He brushed his teeth and stared at his reflection in the mirror in disdain.

 

He called out and got back into bed. 

 

He slept until 5 o’clock, and then felt guilty for doing so, so he got up and went on his run. He ran passed the woman with her flower cart, passed the cafe, passed the tree, and onwards onwards onwards until he could run no more. He slumped down the steps of the subway, panting and sweaty as he grabbed a bottle of water from a vending machine and sipped away as he waited on the platform.

 

He wanted to sit down but the bench was occupied by someone with their face in a book -  _ Piano for the Late Beginner  _ \- so he just stood there instead. 

 

A train pulled up but it wasn’t his. The person on the bench scrambled to collect the things strewn about around him, promptly dropping the piano theory book without notice as he made his way onto the train. 

 

Shiro quickly reached down to grab it. 

 

“Excuse me-” 

 

He held it out but the doors of the subway train closed in front of him. 

 

He locked eyes with the cute man from the cafe the two days previous. 

 

They stared at each other for a long moment, Shiro holding  _ Piano for the Late Beginner  _ out as if frozen and the other man grasping the straps of his backpack in anxiety. 

 

The train pulled away.


	2. about matt

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He promptly dropped his menu over the railing and sighed in annoyance.
> 
> The cute runner he always admired picked it up as he passed by; “Here you go.” Their eyes locked. 
> 
> “Th-thanks…” Matt’s tongue felt too big in his mouth as he replied, taking the menu from the runner’s hands - one of them was prosthetic - and flushing profusely. 
> 
> The runner gave a flustered smile and then continued on his way. Matt watched him leave. 
> 
> “You’re hopeless.” Katie sighed. 
> 
> When he got home he thought of the runner with beautiful eyes and the nice butt until he fell asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> from matt's perspective c:
> 
> tags updated!

When Matt Holt woke up in the morning he swung his mismatched-socked feet out of bed, yawned big and loud, and made his way to the bathroom. He banged on the closed door, groaning when his little sister told him to give her five more minutes. He bounced there for about six minutes before finally the bathroom was free, and then he stepped in so that he could get in the shower and brush his teeth.

 

He quickly got dressed and ran downstairs, stealing his sister’s Ego waffles that popped out of the toaster and stealing his dad’s coffee before he was running out the door, to the subway station. He swiped his card, and then was on his way. 

 

He was fifteen minutes early.

 

He stepped into the office and walked to his cubicle, not minding the odd decorum as he got comfortable. He tapped his pen for a while, pursing his lips until it was time to clock in, and then he was immediately into his work, fixing bugs and pushing his glasses up his nose every fifteen minutes or so when he began to lean too into his computer screen. 

His lunch break was quiet, nose buried in the book he kept at his desk -  _ Piano for the Late Beginner  _ \- as he took notes. Then it was back to work, fingers typing away. Finally, the end of his shift came, and he made his way to the cafe he always visited. He got a coffee from his sister’s friend ( _ Lance,  _ but he only remembered because of his nametag), and then sat across from her as she studied, helping her work through problems she was over thinking and staring emptily out the window.

 

He watched the cute runner he always saw pass by the window outside, eyes trailing after him until he was out of view.

 

“Katie.” 

 

“Mhm?” 

 

Matt’s eyebrows pulled together. “... Hold on; what’s that tone for?” 

 

“You check out that runner guy every time we come here.” He supposed that was enough of an explanation, and didn’t want to delve deeper into her analysation of him. He rested his chin in his hand and flushed, and was quiet for the majority of their study session.

 

They packed up, said goodbye to Katie’s friend, and then made their way onto the subway to go back home. Once there, they ate dinner, and then Matt went up to his room and read his book until he fell asleep.

 

When Matt’s alarm went off he hit the snooze button, and then hit it again fifteen minutes later. Finally, when he got out of bed he went straight to the bathroom to shower, singing along to the music playing through his bluetooth speaker and brushing his teeth.

 

He got dressed and ran downstairs, popping a piece of toast in the microwave and stealing the avocado his sister was in the middle of cutting and running out the door.

 

He swiped his card when he got to the underground and plopping unceremoniously into a seat. Katie’s friend was arguing with someone in the next car - he could see them through the window, but it was obviously a bad time to say hello because his sister’s friend was crying. 

 

He still managed to get to the office thirty minutes early.

 

At work he typed away at his computer, eyebrows furrowed behind his glasses as he coded and sipped away at his coffee.

 

During his lunch break he applied for more jobs in his actual field of study. 

 

He got off work an hour early because there was no more work to be done, and went to the cafe to meet with Katie. Her friend seemed to be in a better mood than when he’d seen him earlier, but he said nothing about that; just accepted his customer service smile and brought his coffee back to the table that Katie had picked outside, promptly dropping his menu over the railing and sighing in annoyance.

 

The cute runner he always admired picked it up as he passed by; “Here you go.” Their eyes locked. 

 

“Th-thanks…” Matt’s tongue felt too big in his mouth as he replied, taking the menu from the runner’s hands - one of them was prosthetic - and flushing profusely. 

 

The runner gave a flustered smile and then continued on his way. Matt watched him leave. 

 

“You’re hopeless.” Katie sighed. 

 

When he got home he thought of the runner with beautiful eyes and the nice butt until he fell asleep. 

 

Waking up the next morning felt odd. He stared at the wall for fifteen minutes before getting out of bed, anxiety beginning to grip his chest as he struggled to find clean clothes. In the end he grabbed things out of his hamper. 

 

He climbed into the shower but just stood there for a while, trying not to start crying and having to turn the shower off because the steam was making it even  _ more  _ difficult to breathe. Instead of eating breakfast he went right out the door, making his way to the subway station. 

 

Instead of going to the platform he went to the bathroom and locked himself in a stall as the dam in his chest broke and he started crying. It took him ten minutes to leave the bathroom. And then he was on his way to work. 

 

He was still thirty minutes early. Instead of going to his desk he locked himself in the bathroom and tried to get all of his tears out. 

 

He was happy to have a cubicle job so that no one could see him physically attempt to collect himself every ten minutes.

 

During lunch he checked his e-mail, and then sought out reprieve in the bathroom again at the rejection email from a job he’d applied to two weeks previous. 

 

Then he said he was feeling ill so that he could leave. 

 

He waited at the cafe for Katie, trying to bury his face in his book -  _ Piano for the Late Beginner  _ \- but only staring at the page instead of filling out any of the exercises or reading any of the information. 

 

Katie’s friend woke him up thirty minutes later to ask if he was alright and if he wanted coffee - Matt hadn’t even realized he’d fallen asleep. “Thanks…” He glanced down at the nametag. “Lance,” he tacked on, belated. 

 

Lance smiled and went back to the register. 

 

When his sister arrived they moved outside. He would’ve missed the cute runner if Katie hadn’t pointed him out, and he turned around almost the same moment the runner did, but he quickly turned back around so they wouldn’t make awkward eye contact. 

 

Katie asked if he was okay, but Matt wasn’t sure how to answer. 

 

They packed up to go home, and once he climbed into bed and cried until he fell asleep.

 

Matt overslept so late that his work called him to ask if everything was alright. His voice was so thick from crying and sleep that they believed him when he said he was still feeling ill. He decidedly didn’t go to work. He sat in bed and read his book, trying not to fall back asleep. It took him about a work day to complete the workbook. At 4:30 he finally got out of bed and decided to go to the music store to buy the next volume. 

 

He took the underground there, wandered around the store for a bit - and bought more than just the next volume of  _ Piano for the Late Beginner _ . 

 

At the station he sorted through his things and then began to read, face buried in his book as he sat on the bench and waited for the subway to meet up with his sister. 

 

The arrival of the underground caught him off guard and he scrambled for his things, shoving them into his bag and practically tripping onto the train. 

 

“Excuse me-” 

 

He turned around on the other side of the entrance, but the door slid shut behind him. 

 

The cute runner was holding out  _ Piano for the Late Beginner _ on the other side of the glass. 

 

Matt opened up his mouth to say something - though he wasn’t sure what - but the subway pulled away before he could say it. 

 

He was too preoccupied to talk to Katie at the cafe. When he went home he stared up at the ceiling until he fell asleep. 

 

The next morning he got up right away and waited for his sister to get out of the shower. He was quick to get dressed and brush his teeth, running downstairs to grab a cup of coffee and a granola bar on his way out the door. 

 

He went to the subway station and waited for his train, staring down at his phone in disinterest until finally he was at work thirty minutes early. 

 

Work began and ended without fanfare.

 

He stared down at his phone in disinterest on his way to meet his sister at the cafe. 

 

Lance was particularly cheerful when Matt walked in that day, smiling bright at Matt as he walked in to order his coffee right away and then go pretend to look at the menu and contemplate on getting something new (even though he knew he wouldn’t). 

 

As usual, Katie was thinking too hard about her homework, and Matt took it from her to give her a break from it, pushing her food closer to her so that she would actually eat. Instead of beginning to eat though, she promptly got up from her seat and excused herself from the table. 

 

Matt sighed, setting the homework aside. 

 

“Uhm-...” He glanced up to see the cute runner, holding a book out to him -  _ Piano for the Late Beginner _ . “You dropped this yesterday?” The runner was red faced as he addressed Matt. 

 

“Oh.” Matt flushed, taking the book from him and staring down at it in almost-mortification. “Thank you, uhm-...” He winced, even though he’d never introduced himself to the cute running man before. Were his glasses fogging up from how much he was blushing? 

 

“I’m Shiro. It’s nice to meet you.” He held out his hand - the prosthetic one. Matt shook it without hesitation. 

 

“Matt.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> come yell at me about voltron on tumblr @ dwreed !

**Author's Note:**

> come yell at me on tumblr @ dwreed ! <3
> 
> inspired by this video by rudy mancuso; https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a_Jh7WwqdQ0


End file.
